It's amazing to think that the girls are just about at 8.5 months old. Their smiling faces and laughter are just about the best parts of my day. I imagine that most parents are overwhelming in love with their children, but I like to think that my love for those little girls transcends all human thinking.
I am a completely different person now. The person who started the infertility journey is long gone. She has been replaced with someone different. I like to think that the three ladies growing inside me left their imprint on my soul and changed me forever. I believe that they have.
I am more patient and respectful than I was previously. I am calmer about certain things and more neurotic about others. I am very easily distracted and very very forgetful. I am a mom.
I am saying this to lead into a totally unrelated, but semi-related discussion. It involves my previous post, the one about the blogger who publicly announced her reduction. I broke down and read her blog. Not all of her blog, but specifically the posts that outlined this pregnancy. Why?
Because she delivered her child. At 25 weeks.
I read it because I had to see if there were signs, if there were elements that God was teaching some bigger lesson here.
I try hard not to get preachy or religious on here. I believe that God has a plan and that we are all working the plan He has outlined for us. I believe in fate. I believe that we are constantly reliving life to learn different things and experience different things important to the end of our all encompassing story that is so much bigger than you or me.
Because of that, I had to find out how her story was playing out. In order to do that I had to go back to the beginning, or at least to the beginning of this particular chapter. In doing so, I learned or inferred things that I wished I hadn't. I publicly defended her in my previous post and now feel that I need to rescind that support. I support nothing about this woman.
I don't want to go further than that. I don't want to spend too much time on the subject, but I had to put that out there since I didn't want anyone to think that I have any sympathy, empathy or otherwise for this woman. I hope her child is healthy and wonderful. I hope he has a good life and supportive parents that love him no matter what. I wish him nothing but the best.
"God doesn't make mistakes..." (unsure of origins)